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MMO Community Kind Of Concerned For One Player Who Spent "between 2,500 And 4,500 Hours" Catching 1 Million Of The Same Terrible Fish By Hand

Pushing the limits of stubbornness and inside jokes, one Old School RuneScape player has spent thousands of hours over several real-life years manually catching one million of the same fish, to the amazement (and concern) of the MMO's community.

Reddit user AvengedKalas, or Zoinks Bro in-game, shared their achievement last week. They estimate it took them "between 2,500 and 4,500 hours" to catch one million raw monkfish on their account. They say they began catching monkfish around the start of the coronavirus pandemic, which at this point would be a good three or so years ago depending on how you define the beginning of it. Frankly, the fact that they seemingly can't account for a 2,000 hour discrepancy is a little concerning, but I suppose MMOs do blend together after a while.  

Done with the hard part of my goal. Cooking starts now. From r/2007scape

AvengedKalas explained in comments that they'd put two or three hours into AFK monkfish fishing a day, splitting their time with streaming services like Netflix and Hulu, or just playing other games – notably Baten Kaitos, an excellent choice – as most OSRS players do during long grinds. OSRS is nothing if not primo second monitor material.  

"Did you ever think about quitting early?" asked one no-doubt awestruck player. 

"Nah. It wasn't a matter of if but a matter of when," AvengedKalas said. 

"You ok?" asked another onlooker.

"No," AvengedKalas replied. Welp. 

Don't get too concerned. Another viewer expressed that "I get that everyone needs an escape and some downtime doing things they enjoy but fuck me what a complete waste of your life." AvengedKalas calmly told them "I'm content with everything." Sometimes you just gotta zen out and catch a million monkfish, I guess. 

Unbelievably, AvengedKalas says they now plan to cook all one million fish. It looks like they weren't kidding: the OSRS hiscores confirm that Zoinks Bro has already more than doubled the amount of XP needed to reach the max Cooking skill level of 99. 

If you're wondering, Zoinks Bro also has over 11 times the amount of XP needed for 99 Fishing. At 145 million XP, they're 'just' 55 million XP away from the in-game limit. In a Reddit reply, they said they'll knock out the last 55 million after all the cooking is done. 

Now hang on a minute. Monkfish give 150 Fishing XP apiece. How does Zoinks Bro only have 145 million Fishing XP despite having 1 million monkfish? These are the questions that keep me up at night, reader. 

I suppose they could've bought a few (thousand) monkfish, but the more likely explanation is that they used one of the equippable blessings that gives you a small chance of landing two fish at once without doubling your actual XP gains. I'm not super familiar with this area of OSRS, but I do know their account has the stats to earn at least a medium-tier blessing, and the 4% bonus fish it would contribute basically evens out the XP math. I've reached out to AvengedKalas to ask about this important mystery. 

(Image credit: Jagex / Hi-Rez / YouTube via Xbox)

As is always the case with the daunting grinds that OSRS players pull off with such frightening regularity, the big question here is simple: why? AvengedKalas' mind is an enigma, their reasoning at once confounding yet believable: "An inside joke that got out of control." 

The other question that many people – myself included – have asked is: why monkfish? I realize that monkfish are easy to catch while AFK, but that's true of a lot of OSRS fish, including the karambwans that are much better for healing than monkfish. Not only that, karambwan are worth a lot more, though I suppose value isn't as much of a concern since Zoinks Bro is a hardcore ironman account, meaning they haven't died a single time and they can't trade with other players. That actually makes this grind more absurd, come to think of it, because it means they can't even convert these fish into gold via the in-game market. 

So, why not karambwans? "I don't find karambwans as relaxing," AvengedKalas said in a Reddit reply. "To each their own. I enjoy monks," they said in another post. You've gotta respect that. I'm sure the monkfish do; they can't have many stans given that these fish look like a nightmare that was recently sat on by another, heavier nightmare. Well, maybe the million dead ones stashed away in Zoinks Bro's bank aren't thrilled, but you know what I mean. 

"The real question: are you proud of it?" asks another OSRS player. 

"Yeah," AvengedKalas affirmed. When it comes to self-imposed OSRS grinds, that's what matters. Godspeed, you monkfish amassing madman. 

Last month, the OSRS devs watched in horror and awe as thousands of players dogpiled a 16-year-old minigame just to break it and farm XP by getting addicted to fruit. 

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Here's What You Need To Know About Streaky Bacon

Iconic British streaky bacon can be tough to track down in the U.S. -- maybe because the USDA only recognizes the traditional American iteration in its technical "bacon" definition: "The cured belly of a swine." Any other cut of meat, like streaky bacon, must be explicitly labeled as "pork loin bacon" or a similar descriptive title referring to where on the pig the cut of meat comes from. Indeed, the difference between the types has less to do with preparation than with the actual cut of meat itself.

Streaky bacon could be described as the midpoint between American and Canadian bacon. American bacon is cut from the pork belly, and Canadian bacon is cut from the pork loin. Traditional British bacon is cut from the back with part of the belly attached and combines both the crave-able leanness and fattiness into one cut. This best-of-both-worlds composition is the result of a highly specialized cut, encompassing both loin and belly.

The "streaky" part of the name comes from the long, layered ripples of fat that run parallel to the rind. This high-fat content makes streaky bacon crispy when fried. It's cut into round slices (aka rasher), which are thicker and chewier than American bacon strips. Some U.K. Foodies use the terms "streaky bacon" and "back bacon" interchangeably to refer to the same cut of meat. To others, these are two different things, with back bacon being slightly leaner and streaky bacon being slightly fattier.

Read more: 8 Absolute Best Cuts Of Meat To Deep Fry

Traditional British rasher-wrapped sausages on plate - Sgaphoto/Getty Images

In the U.K., farmers have bred generations of pigs specifically for producing top-tier cuts of streaky bacon. The genetic lineage of the Yorkshire and Tamworth pig breeds are revered as especially good for streaky bacon, which is subjected to varying regional methods of curing and smoking. In general, a dry-cure is considered preferable to a wet-cure.

Streaky bacon is sold by individual rashers or larger cuts, either smoked or unsmoked (aka "green"). Much like American bacon, it can be baked in the oven or pan-fried on the stove. For traditional cooking, fry rashers for 2-3 minutes on each side. Larger cuts of back bacon should be boiled or roasted for approximately 20-30 minutes.

Streaky bacon (aka side bacon) is a crucial part of a classic full English breakfast, but that's far from this savory food's only use. It can be made into a delicious BLT or bacon Reuben sandwich. Around the holiday season, many British foodies wrap rashers of streaky bacon around sausages as a festive treat, pigs in a blanket style. Additionally, you could try wrapping streaky bacon around roasted monkfish for an elevated hors d'oeuvre or crumble it into pasta carbonara or thick, comforting split pea soup.

When thinking ahead about how and when to utilize your steaky bacon, it's important to note that unsmoked streaky bacon will keep in the fridge for seven days, and smoked will keep for 10. For maximum longevity, the meat should be wrapped in greaseproof deli paper. Now that you know all about this British delicacy, it's time to go experiment!

Read the original article on Tasting Table.

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Wrap Monkfish In Parma Ham For A Balanced Sweet And Salty Flavor

While harmony is always much appreciated, a contrast in flavor is sometimes the key to an irresistible and strikingly memorable dish. It highlights the ingredients' best features and layers in stunning complexity, keeping the flavor profile from being too one-dimensional. For something that's often regarded as mild and sweet like monkfish, a salty Parma ham wrap is just the juxtaposition needed to bring out its best qualities. This exquisite combination lays a bold base that enhances the fish's delicate nature without taking anything away. With each bite, you get an ever-winding carousel of sweet, salty, savory, and nutty flavors. These notes seamlessly meld into each other, striking the perfect balance between contrasting and complementing.

Although the flavor interplay is the main focus, this combination also comes with a few other perks. The first one is an eye-catching, elegant visual appeal that makes the meal feel like a fine dining experience. It's a unique sight for sure; the rosy rich ham enrobing the white monkfish, all perhaps drenched in a dark marinade and surrounded by colorful vegetables. Another bonus point is the enhancement of texture, especially with the fish. Wrapped in Parma ham, the monkfish retains its moisture during the cooking process so there's no need to worry about dryness. What you end up getting is perfectly tender, flaky meat that's also soaked in flavor.

Read more: 15 Different Ways To Cook Fish

hand picking up monkfish filet

This monkfish and Parma ham combination's potential stretches beyond those two ingredients. If you have some time on your hands, consider bringing some spices and condiments to the party. Make a marinade from olive oil, citrus, herbs, and spices to thoroughly infuse the fish with a deeply enticing scent. Alternatively, you can make a sauce from dry wine, balsamic, mustard, pesto, salsa, etc. To coat everything with an extra layer of flavor. You can also include leafy greens in the wrap for an earthy spike to cut through all the sweet and salty notes.

As for serving, you also have quite a few options. Keep the Parma ham-wrapped fish company with a colorful serving of sun-dried tomatoes packed in olive oil, baby potatoes, asparagus, and anything else you prefer on the side. Not only will this enhance the dish's nutritional value, but it will also diversify the flavors and textures for a more tumultuous, exciting eating experience. Add a bed of couscous, lentils, or noodles, and you've got a stunning main course fit for any occasion.

For garnishing, a sprinkle of nuts is fantastic for adding a smidgen of crunch and that fun nutty undertone. Of course, if nuts aren't really your favorite, use herbs like dill, rosemary, or basil for an aromatic finish. Beyond these choices, there are also quite a few others to get creative with. Whatever you have in mind, give it a go to explore this dish's endless possibilities.

Read the original article on Tasting Table.

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